One of the most helpful tips I can give you for understanding Body Language is to “feel it first.” By this, I mean tap into your own body and read what is there. Literally, stop and take a few deep breaths. Notice where your body is tight or catches itself from the deep inhalation. Notice how deeply you can breathe. Notice if there is any area of the body that is asking for your attention. I call this exercise in body awareness, attention, and relaxation, “deliberate breathing.”
As you do this breathing exercise, don’t attempt to change anything in the body or the way you feel about the body. Simply notice where you attention and awareness goes in the body. Feel what the body is telling by how it feels. Are your feet evenly planted on the floor? Do you have a wide stance or are your legs crossed? Are you leaning into one hip or is your pelvis titled forward or backward? Is your chest puffed out or are you caved in on yourself? Are your shoulders tense and uneven, or dropped and relaxed. Is there tension or relaxation in your elbows, wrists, hands? Do you have a pain in the neck? Is your head tilted? What is your face doing — scrunched, smiling, furrowed brows, tight lips, etc.? Each of these things tells you something about your body and how you are feeling this moment. Feel into what your body is telling you. Identify the feeling. Don’t judge it (a big no-no in Body Language). Instead, simply acknowledge what your body is doing and the corresponding feeling that goes with the posture, pain, discomfort, or openness reflected in your body. Before you read another book on Body Language or another specialist’s words about it (okay, do finish this blog posting), decide for yourself what your body is telling you. Ultimately, reading and understanding body language is best comprehended by understanding the feelings in your own body first. Later, you can use your body as a tool to mimic the postures, stances, gestures, walks, and physical mannerisms of others. With a developed awareness of your own body and by adopting the physicality of others, your body and brain will work together to inform you what others are thinking, feeling, and subconsciously conveying to the world.
I’ll get more deeply into this subject with the next posting and give you a few tips as to how mimicry of another person’s Body Language helps to understand that person more completely. You’ll even learn how to mimic Body Language that conveys success, confidence, self-esteem, and attractiveness.
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Body Talkin’,
Mark Edgar Stephens
Mark Edgar Stephens' Inspiration Blog 